What they actually mean ......

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  • jaan_matt
    Weindianvip
    • Jan 2007
    • 713

    What they actually mean ......

    Employer Speak: what they say and what they mean by it

    Entry level position:You'll be making minimum wage.

    Entry level position in an up-and-coming company:You'll be making minimum wage; we'll be bankrupt in a year.

    Profit sharing plannce it's shared between the higher-ups, there won't be a profit.

    Competitive salary:We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

    Join our fast-paced company:We have no time to train you; you'll have to introduce yourself to your coworkers.

    Nationally recognized leader:Inc. Magazine wrote us up a few years ago, but we haven't done anything innovative since.

    Immediate opening:The person who used to have this job gave notice a month ago. We're just now running the ad.

    Casual work atmosphere:We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up, although a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings.

    Competitive environment:We have a lot of turnover.

    Must be deadline oriented:You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day.

    Some overtime required:Some time each night and some time each weekend.

    Flexible hours:Work 40 hours; get paid for 25.

    Must have an eye for detail:We have no quality control.

    College degree preferred:Unless you wasted those four years studying something useless like Philosophy, English or Social Work.

    Career minded:Female Applicants must be childless (and remain that way).

    Apply in person:If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled.

    No phone calls please:We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.

    Problem solving skills a must:You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

    Requires team leadership skills:You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

    C&P
  • teena
    • Nov 2006
    • 5716

    #2
    Nice one jaan ...danx for posting.....yawn...hehe..

    Comment

    • sonumary
      • Sep 2006
      • 2085

      #3
      nice one da...but quiet loooong

      ~*~The height of pain in life is to sit near the person
      u love d most .....
      knowing that the person can never b urs ...!!!!!~*~

      Comment

      • sparrow
        • Dec 2006
        • 3974

        #4
        thats a really nice one.... keep posting
        Never regret a day in your life. Good days give you happiness; bad days give you experiences; both are essential to life-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

        Comment

        • johncena
          Weindianvip
          • Sep 2006
          • 812

          #5
          wooow..this is a good post.. thanks ...keeep working..on it.. I expect more from u !!
          " YOU CAN'T SEE ME , MY TIME IS NOW..."

          JOHN CENA

          Comment

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